In the Darkness

Sometimeswords do not workButfeelings doeven when you wish they didn’t Love others. Love self. Love coffee. #coffeewithasideofcowbell #coffeeandcowbell #grief #trauma #anniversary #momblog #family

What Makes a Dream a Nightmare…

With PTSD, one of the many ways intrusive thoughts interfere with everyday life is through nightmares. Every PTSD questionnaire I’ve answered has asked if I have nightmares. Until VERY recently, I assumed nightmares had to be excessively scary. When my daughter dreamt that a bear was chasing her and she woke up begging me toContinue reading “What Makes a Dream a Nightmare…”

Therapy Again…

Just finished up my intake at the Syracuse VA so I can start working through trauma in the PTSD Clinic. Some days I just want the shit in my head to go away. It’s so weird thinking that I’ve been stuck in a similar mental state for 13 years. There’s a chance I’ll be 75Continue reading “Therapy Again…”

Oki the Pup

We got a puppy! I’ve promised Emma we could get a dog since she could talk, but we had to wait until we settled somewhere. Full disclosure, I am not an animal person. I’ve never wanted a pet. I’ve never been super fond of other people’s pets. That is, until I met my sister’s dog,Continue reading “Oki the Pup”

Onward to Therapy! Again!

I finished up my regular therapy sessions in early June. CPT is rough for anyone, but add to it that my therapist and I didn’t really jive, and you can guess that it was a very long and painful six months, with sessions ranging from once every two weeks to twice a week. Since thenContinue reading “Onward to Therapy! Again!”

Well, You Failed Therapy

I finished up my Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT) appointments this week. I talked a little about it in Milkshakes and Meditation…it was hit-or-miss on days that felt helpful or not, and days that felt rough or not. In the end I was told I “showed some improvements but the results weren’t what they wanted.” IContinue reading “Well, You Failed Therapy”

Trials and Tribulations: month vs Month

This year marks 13 years since losing my dad and two sisters in a murder/suicide. It took me until last year to finally ask for help dealing with the incident. It’s never too late to start addressing issues and taking care of yourself…you deserve to feel safe, healthy, and joyful no matter what you’ve beenContinue reading “Trials and Tribulations: month vs Month”